Deal with It…

 

“When you are angry, don’t let that anger make you sin,” and don’t stay angry all day. Don’t give the devil a way to defeat you (Ephesians 4:26-27).

It is never going to be easy to deal with anger, but it is something that needs to be done. Acknowledge that’s there; dig deep down to the roots of the anger, dig it up from beneath the layers of denial and deal with it. It may seem “unchristian-like” to be indignant, so you’ve become a professional at suffering from animosity with grace. Usually, when we can’t seem to get over rejection, heartache, or pain; anger is the root of the problem.

Anger has been festering at your wound for a very long time. Now it the time to heal that nasty wound. You are tired of being hurt. You no longer want to be vulnerable and exposed.

Yes!! it is not a sin to be mad or upset, but it is a sin to let anger fester into resentment, bitterness, or destructive rage.

 

Dear Father,

Please help us to deal with it. We know that if it is not of you, it is not welcome in your house and we need to get rid of it. Help us to promote a clean house for you to dwell in, Oh Lord! A house where you can rest, and be at peace. A house where the devil would not be able to survive in. Thank you Father, for showing us how the right path and it’s through your word. Anger will no longer cause suffering, heartache and pain, because I’m just going to deal with it.

A Small Revelation…

Morning, I was reading something today that truly blessed me… Proverbs 4:25 “Keep your eyes on the path, and look straight ahead”…

Words that seem so simple, but truly hold meaning in our daily lives. Sometimes, we as humans, forget to look forward… We always want to look back, pick up stuff that we let go, and never seem to forget it… We let it go for a reason, so why is it that we are always looking back? God has something for all of us, especially me…. I’m tired of looking behind me… I declare today that I’m going to keep my eyes on the path and Trust God as I move forward. Some says it’s easier said than done… Well, this may be true but when you really want to live in peace, you will make the conscious decision to do just that. When you get sick; of being sick and tired, you will do just that… I know that I haven’t lived the most perfect life, and quite frankly, I don’t know anyone who have, (so if there is anyone that you know that have, then I would like to shake their hand)… But I do know what’s in my heart, and it’s nothing malicious, by far, I’m filled with love… Just as God intended me to be… He wants us to love, live in peace, forgive and believe… I will take my chances on God before I look back again… So remember all my family and friends, make the conscious decision to “Keep your eyes on the path, and look straight ahead” Your victory awaits You!

 

AMEN!!!

Memoir of a Woman Gone Mad!!

Dear Diary:

As I sit up late at night, asking God what in the world is going on with my life. Where did I go wrong? How did it end up like this?

You see, I always seem to have it together; always. When I do things, people make the assumption that I have it like that, but in all reality, I don’t. I don’t have fiddle squat. I have a beautiful heart, a very intellectual mind and a bad attitude. I like making the world see me as this superwoman, because that I feel I am. But the world doesn’t know that I cry every single night, because no one truly loves me, no one genuinely cares for me but my God and my daughter. My mother, sisters and brother, I know they love me too, and for the most part, my family; and Hell, sometimes I question their love for me too. LOL!! But I know, I serve a merciful God, he loves me in spite of me.

You see as I walk this new walk, I realize that my life is not going to be the same again. No more business as usual. I see things differently. I even want to act different. Sometimes when I even think of things that are not of God, I feel bad just for thinking it.  It seems crazy but there are so many things that I need to cleanse myself of, I know that it’s not an overnight purge, but it will definitely be a well needed colon cleanse. No, spiritual cleanse. Now it’s not just my body being transformed, but it’s my mind that is being transformed.

You see, I have recently decided to help young teen girls in my community by developing a teen empowerment program. Thanks to my very loving, caring, intellectual and might I add spoiled daughter, I have given up all my Saturdays to be with very rude, obnoxious but teen girls with plenty of potential. We talk, we laugh, we learn and we build healthy relationships. For some of these young ladies, this program would probably be the only positive thing they would encounter in their life, at the rate the society is going. But anyway, as I sit and think of all the positive elements of love and life, I can instill in my young ladies. I must remember that I too can use a dose of my own medicine.

How can I instill greatness into young teen girls and still have pity on myself? Nope, that is not an option. Who would have thought that as I try to better my young ladies, the therapy that was much-needed for me, is being performed too, who knew? I’ve come to the realization that this was God creative plan all along. He seems to always get his point across, by showing me my purpose through my daughter. LOL!! That seem to have been the only reason, I had to have her when I did. You see, I have lost quite a few children in my life and she was the only one that made it through. She walked into my life and gave my life a purpose, just as I was about to give up on life. Here she comes!! I tell you, my daughter is and will always be considered in my mind, my guardian angel.

You see, as long as I align my steps in my life according to my developing her into a virtuous woman, my life has a purpose. Just like the birth of SC Precious Jewels, the birth of SC Precious Jewels became the rebirth of me. That is my purpose, it will be my legacy.

But just like any great thing that has entered our realm of life; you have the naysayers, and the dream killers coming along to crush your dreams. I never really had a dream until now; I had little goals that I needed to accomplish in my life, but never really a dream. I work all day, just to survive but never dreamed. Like, I mentioned earlier, it goes back to people assuming that I have it together. That’s because I strive to accomplish my many little goals, but never once did I accomplish that big dream.

Since there is a first time for everything, I would like the world to sit back, relax and enjoy my journey to my greatest accomplishment in life, my dream. I would like to take you on the journey with me, the roller coaster ride, the emotions, determination and the will to survive and become something great because I feel that is my purpose in life.

My grandmother always used to tell me that I was a force to be reckoned with. I am supposed to be great, if I didn’t get my priorities in order, my daughter would leave me behind. This was her message to me, from the first day she laid eyes on my daughter, and so far all that she has said has come true. Even when I’m down, I hear her yelling at me, for this I’m grateful.

I’m grateful to have wonderful people in my life; and grateful for the people who are not so wonderful. I’ve noticed that they are my reminders, so I do need them.

You see, one thing that I always hear my Pastor preach, everything in our life is only for a season. Once that season changes, all those in it has to go too. I feel like my season is about to change.

Respectfully,

Memoirs of a Woman Gone Mad!!

 

 

 

My Love Prayer…

“Give all your worries to him, because he cares for you.”(1 peter 5:7)
” Though he may stumble, he may not fall, for the Lord upholds him with his hand”(psalm 37:24)

Thank you Lord for being concerned about everything that goes on in my life, Good, bad, pretty or ugly. Knowing that you are the living God, who can do all things; I need not to worry. You will lift me up if ever I fall. You will carry me if ever I can’t carry myself. So for this, I thank you. All the worries of the world, I leave it all to you. So you can continue to bring peace, love and joy to those whom I love the most (my precious family) and to those whom I don’t know at all. You are my guide; so my feet shall not slide.

I pray this prayer to you for me and my family. 2016 is the year of Love… In Jesus name I pray… AMEN

I BELIEVE

angel-wings

Years ago when I was young,  I believed in the morning sun.

When it rises I was at peace,

Despite all the anger and turmoil that eventually created a beast.

 

Time moved on and life has taken effect;

I clinched at the sight of people and their many antics.

My family were my keepers and I was theirs,

We loved and we fought but still remains, they were my all and my everything.

Life became harsh and crueler by the day

But I still believed that as the sun arised, I will be okay.

Then the most amazing thing appeared. I became the mother of this precious teddy bear.

She gave me hope, she built my pride

I began to see life clearer as the sun continues to rise…

child-angel

Trials and tribulations are going to come;

It’s how you handle them that matters, at least for some.

GOD knew I was on a road to destruction,

So HE sent me an angel to tell me something…

“Take a minute, my child. Stop and breath. I had a problem because you stopped believing in me. No matter what happens in life, look at the rising sun, through its rays and light I will bring you peace and eternal comfort.”

My daughter, I see!! Became the person who reminded me to believe.

“Mommy, look at the birds in the sky. Mommy, look at how the sun is so high. Mommy, smell the flowers in the rose bush ahead. Where do it come from? How did it all get here?”

Before I understood the creator of the Earth, I believed HE moved gracefully among us.

So I said, “HE is the Father of all things. The King of all Kings. HE is the reason why you are here. HE is the reason I have no fear.”

From that day forth, I understood why when the sun arose I was at peace and I was all good.

The moment I gave that up. Life obstacles began to turn me into dust.

My GOD… HE heard my cry and gave me reason to rise!!

My daughter gave me life. My daughter gave me breath.

I vowed to never let life take away my peace ever again.

Today, Life happens… It’s inevitable!!

But I truly believe… I truly have faith…

I trust My GOD will always be leading the way!!!

Power of Forgiveness…

heaven2What does it feel like to have the power to forgive?

Does it feel like joy dancing around in your heart?

Does it feel like waves soaring in the ocean breeze?

What does it feel like to have the power to forgive?

Because I surely don’t know what that is.

What does… what does it feel like to have the power to forgive?

To forgive thy mother whose harsh and cruel words

 sometimes slit your throat, and stopped you from breathing

But those same words were your motivation;

Yet she loved like no other… Unconditional love.

To forgive thy father who left you in this relentless world;

To be raised, when in fact he should have done it himself,

Yet he has taught you so many lessons… lessons on life and survival.

What does it feel like to forgive the people in the street?

After they have chased you and beat you

and transformed you into a heartless woman,

All because you don’t follow the status quo.

Your name means more than who you are as a person.

What does it feel like to forgive… forgive anyone and anything?

That deemed it necessary to take a piece of you…

With every debilitating stare, words from a violent tongue,

With every pulsating blow right to the head,

With every knife that pierced your little body…

They took a piece of you and diminished  you to nothing…

What does it feel like?

They know not what they do, they had no way of understanding.

It was all that they knew how to do and that’s survive.

So how do you forgive?

How do you open up your heart, when there is nothing left but a brick wall,

How do you love your child when there’s convictions of what true love really is,

I know my mother loves me. I know my father loves me.

But God bless the child who carries its own…

I’m at the place right now, where I have to carry my own.

God is staring me in my face,

Speaking ever so clearly… “I’m here, I’m here My child, I’m here.

Accept me. Believe me. Trust me. I’ve always carried you through.

I’ve carried you through the times when you thought no one was there.

When no one was listening, watching or staring you in the face.

I’ve carried you through the times when your heart was so broken,

And the pain was so intense, you thought that life wasn’t worthy of your presence.

I was there My child to pick up off the floor  when you were stomped down. So you see, I’ve always been there even when you had no knowledge of who I was.

The abuse. The turmoil. The confusion. The defeat. Yes! I’ve been through it all with you. I was the one that gave you the strength to carry you through.

Speaking on your behalf  when you had no knowledge of who I am.”

God is staring me in my face, telling me to forgive myself.

“You couldn’t change the environment that you were in, but I’m telling you now to change the mindset that you have! You know better now! You know me!

Oh how awesome is our God!!!

It is so powerful to be able to forgive.

 

I forgive. I forgive myself…

I forgive myself for allowing my Self to beat up on myself for so many years. For the choices that I’ve chosen to make, knowing that they were the choices that I shouldn’t have made. For allowing myself to be used and abused. For allowing myself to be played for a fool.

I forgive myself for being a victim in my world of convictions.

For not standing up and declaring my own victory. I forgive myself!

Oh God, I thank You!!! I thank You for allowing me to say that I forgive myself. I couldn’t have made it without You, without releasing the burdens of my soul. Thank You for being a merciful God!

I couldn’t go any further if I couldn’t forgive myself.

How could I seek the ultimate kingdom if I couldn’t love myself?

How could I love another if I couldn’t help myself?

I stand today to release Boo-bie.

Boo-bie was my savior,

Boo-bie can rest and its time for Na-Tasha to Rise!

The power of forgiveness…

The power of forgiveness puts joy in your heart!

The power of forgiveness puts peace in your mind!

The power of forgiveness puts serenity in your world!

OH WOW!!! This is the feeling of forgiveness.

I rejoice! I rejoice! I rejoice! because I forgive.

I love! I’ve conquered!!!

What a joy, To embrace the power of forgiveness!

 

Rise Up!! Soldier Girlz… Rise Up!

warriorRise Up!! Soldier Girlz… Rise Up!

Stand your position. It’s time to stand your ground!

You have been called to do a duty.

You have been called to war.

No more hiding behind the walls,

While the army is on the battlefield!

Rise up!! Soldier Girlz… Rise Up!

Stand your position. It’s time to stand your ground!

If you can’t stand up for what you believe in, then who do you stand for?

If you can’t run with the footmen,

Then the horses we will never endure.

YOU STAND FOR STRENGTH.

YOU STAND FOR TOGETHERNESS.

YOU STAND FOR UNITY.

YOU ARE ONE.

You are called to place on a shield of armor,

And into the battle you shall go!

You are built to endure hardships and pain;

You are built to cry, pray, wail and fast until the angels’ swarm.

Rise Up!! Soldier Girlz… Rise Up!

Stand your position. It’s time to stand your ground!

No more hiding behind the hedges waiting this battle out.

It’s time to go to war. Leave no soldier girlz behind.

No more wrestling with insecurities, you’re going to shoot those suckers out.

No more stealing your confidence and joy.

You’re going to fight for everything that the devil tried to steal from you.

The Lord says, “Trust in the Rock of Zion, and you shall never be disappointed.”

Hold on to His word. Hide it in your heart. Live the life of righteousness.

The devil will fall apart!

You were built for this battle! You were built for this war!

Just put on the armor of righteousness; And into the battle you go!!!

Rise Up!! Soldier Girlz… Rise Up!fc985bbda634fbc04190edddaf047ffa