As a young girl, I continuously despised people and nobody could understand why. Not even I understood why I always wanted to fight. I just didn’t like people who displayed a bunch of foolishness.
If you tried to bully me… we were fighting!
If you disrespected my mother or grandmothers… we were fighting!
If you tried to bully my sisters and brother… we were fighting!
Depending on the day, if you looked at me too hard… we were fighting!
It didn’t matter what size you were, or if it was more than one of you… we were fighting!
This went on for many years until one day, an elderly Guyanese woman looked at me and stated, “You are nobody’s fool!!! So why are you making a jackass of yourself???” At first, I laughed. Then I asked her if she knew my grandmother, because that woman was forever telling me that. Then she said so seriously, “No! But your grandmother must speak to GOD.” I stopped and paused almost in disbelief. I knew my grandmother believed in GOD, but actually talk to him? It never dawned on me that could be possible. Being the ignorant woman that I was I replied, “No! she can’t be talking to GOD! If she did and she loved me, I wouldn’t be cursed!” What I heard next resonated in my mind and spirit for the rest of my days. I couldn’t have known that the words I was about to hear would be my blessing. This elderly Guyanese woman said, “Your grandmother is a blessed woman! she prays for you daily. But you… young lady are not cursed. You are truly blessed as well. You are going to be a victor who breaks all generational curses. You are the oldest and the wisest of them all. You will set the precedence for the rest of the family. All who truly love you from near and far will listen. They will come to hear you speak life into them.”
At that very moment, the tears began to flow down my cheeks. For the first time, I was crying and they were not tears of pain, but tears of joy. How could anyone speak so highly to me? A young woman that was torn and scarred, but this stranger who knew nothing of my tainted past, and was speaking life into me. My grandmother always preached prosperity into my life, but that was what loving grandmothers were supposed to do, or so I thought. “Oh… that’s just grandma talking! That’s her job.” But then to have this elder speak the same words of encouragement, words of life, words of belief, and words of hope was simply amazing. I guess GOD is truly real. But why? Why did I feel so much anguish? So much hurt and so much pain? I couldn’t help but to ask this. Through the tears I asked, “Why am I so broken?” It was at that moment the truth was about to be my salvation. I was about to be set free! She said, “GOD comes to heal the broken. It’s not the righteous, HE seeks, it is the unrighteous. They are the ones that can show HIS miracles well. He wants the murderers. The thieves. The adulterers and the prostitutes. They are the ones who will spread HIS WORD victoriously, because they will always remember where HE brought them from. Don’t you praise the doctors when you are sick and they heal you? That is GOD to us. HE is our provider. Our mind regulator. Who can say that better than the person HE has healed? Who can say that better than the person HE picked up off the street and made them whole again? This is why you are broken! So when HE fixes you, you know exactly who to thank.”
The tears were flowing more rapidly. It was as if a new found spirit entered my soul. I was no longer crying tears of guilt or defeat. They were tears of hope. At that very moment I knew I had a reason to live. This elderly Guyanese woman changed my whole outlook on life, with her words of hope, her words of peace and prosperity. From that day forth, she has always been a special part of my day until the day she died.
But how many of you know that GOD is so good? After this lovely soul left us peacefully and went to her heavenly home; One year later I gave birth to her great granddaughter. The spirit of this lovely Guyanese woman remained with me forever; in the life of my precious little girl. My daughter truly resembles her great grandmother in mind, body and soul. Our family is truly blessed to live with granny’s spirit just a little while longer.
Thank you Lord for letting me know that I’m NOBODY’s FOOL, Thank you for helping me to stop making a jackass out of myself!!!